Brush with Celebrity: Ronnie James Dio

I have a lot of weird celebrity stories, actually, but I'll take any excuse to whip this photo out:

So, I used to work in music promotion (as I think most of you know) and the place I worked specialized mostly in promoting has-beens or never-was artists. One of our client labels handled hair metal acts, and their roster included Ronnie James Dio.

Now, I still know very little about metal, but at that point in my life I knew zero. Nada. I mean, i could maybe pick out Metallica in a lineup, and I knew that Megadeth had the best album covers. And, you know, Ozzy bit a bat's head off. But Dio? No freaking way, I didn't really know who he was.

For the sake of my readers who share my predicament, it's best that you understand that Ronnie himself considers one of the most lasting parts of his legacy to be that he is allegedly responsible for creating the "devil's horns" hand gesture that is so essential to enjoying heavy metal music. ASCII art representation follows:

\m/

Anyway, RJD had a new album out (this is around 2000 or so) and we did promo on it, so we went to the release party. If I remember correctly, it was at a crappy LES bar. Towards the end of our brief stint at the party, our crew got our picture snapped with RJD.

Please understand: Ronnie James Dio is about five feet tall. Maybe five two. He's not just short, he's Prince-short. So in the photo above, we're slouching for all we're worth. Brent (on the left in hat) is a tall guy, Six-two or six-four or something. And Josh, who's in the front, is not actually a hobbit. Plus I was basically crouching as low as I could go and still look like I was standing.

In all, I think we came off looking appropriately ridiculous. And I am astounded to find, during the course of my wikipedia research for this post, that the album that we were celebrating the release of peaked at #13 on the  U.S. charts. Anything is possible!

I give you now the lyrics to Fever Dreams, off of this album Magica:

Lately when my demons drag the night across my eyes.
I just can't seem to fight it anymore.
Yield unto temptation and be ruler of the world.
But it seems that I have heard that song before.
And the voices begin to sing... come home!

I have seen some evil as I've walked upon the Earth.
But this is way beyond what eyes can see.
Wicked is as wicked does and if I lose control.
Is this the way that Hell is gonna be?

Have I fallen too far to rise?
Been burning too long in the fire.
Then it all falls down... tearing the night away.
It must be fever dreams...
Fever dreams...
Fever dreams...

Now before my demons roll the night across my eyes.
I tremble as I wake, perhaps to sin.
Yield unto temptation and be ruler of the world.
And all I do is let the beast come in.

Have I fallen too far to rise?
I've been standing too long in the fire.
Let it all fall down... tearing the night away.
It must be fever dreams...
From the outside, fever dreams...
Fever dreams... X9

Also, you may remember this photo of me and Dio being cropped and used during RJD's ill-fated 2004 presidential bid.