This is not rebellion.

Jun 27, 2006 at 12:31 PM
22 comments

I went to Starbucks today, sometimes I do that. I got a big iced tea. One of the customers who preceded me ws a guy in full bike messenger-chic regalia: a sleeve tattoo, various piercings, dyed hair. His drink? A frothy, iced something-or-other with a huge pile of whipped cream and chocolate sauce on top.

And when he got it, he made the Dio-style "ROCK AND ROLL!" devil horns to indicate his happiness with having gotten the beverage.

No, motherfucker, no. You getting your 700 calorie melted milkshake from Starbucks is not rock and roll. It is neither rock nor roll. It is not fuck-the-man, and it is also not devil-may-care. It's a giant fucking melted milkshake. You basically got a Frostee under the guise of drinking coffee, and now you don't even have the decency to feel ashamed and slightly embarrassed like the rest of us.

I hope your next piercing gets infected.

22 comments

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Did he have an iPod too? I think I know the guy.

Secretly playing on his iPod: Celine Dion.

did he buy that pearl jam cd they have on the counter too?

oh, the humanity.

anil, were we not on different sides of the country, i might have to kiss you full on the mouth.

pearl jam? didn't they used to be a rock band?

unless he lives day-to-day in a repressed life where getting starbucks is forbidden by his tea cup yorkie. then, it might be an effen awesome moment.

"I got a big iced tea."
you can't use the term "big" at starbucks. you have to use their language or else they wont make you the drink. big? large? what? oh, you mean venti?

starbucks is sooo badass and rock and roll. where is your camera phone and photo post of this guy? :)

yay! i'm not the only one who refuses to use their fabricated pho-italian size-names!

"I just wanted to mention that I go to starbucks like every day of my life. I'm a patsy for the man."

Next time I'm at Starbucks, which will hopefully not be for a long time, I'm gonna order a "Biggie Hot Chocolate".

"forbidden by his tea cup yorkie"

that is a hysterical mental image.

Questionable Content has a take on fake italian at coffee houses.

I thought the Italian-y size names were 100% a Starbucks thing until I moved to Seattle, where just about every place uses the same nomenclature. Odd.

Yea, I actually realized a nearby Tully's uses the same language. Ridiculous. I always considered Tully's to be the Anti-Starbucks. Not anymore.

pearl jam? didn't they used to be a rock band?

Sort of. Anyway, I saw this last week in the San Diego Starbucks and felt a little sad for them. Of course, it beats working in the fish market section of a major chain supermarket in Ballard which is why Eddie Vedder did for many years after the bloom had worn off of the Pearl Jam rose.